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Donald Trump says Emmanuel Macron “loves holding my hand”

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In a long interview with the New York Times, published Wednesday July 19, President Donald Trump mused over his recent diplomatic trip to Paris to attend Bastille Day ceremonies and represent the US during the centennial anniversary of the US’s entrance into World War I.

Continuing the cease fire in the Shade War, he sang the praises of French President Emmanuel Macron. “He’s a great guy. Smart. Strong,” said Trump, before remarking, “Loves holding my hand.” The two presidents have exchanged a series of testosterone-filled handshakes. “People don’t realize he loves holding my hand. And that’s good, as far as that goes. … I mean, really. He’s a very good person. And a tough guy, but look, he has to be. I think he is going to be a terrific president of France. But he does love holding my hand.”

Much to the dismay of Trump’s good ol’ buddy Jim, the American president had plenty of positive things to say about his trip, including the military parade down the Champs-Elysées. “It was one of the most beautiful parades I have ever seen. And in fact, we should do one one day down Pennsylvania Ave,” said Trump. (He had wanted a military parade for his inauguration.) “But the Bastille Day parade was — now that was a super-duper — O.K. I mean, that was very much more than normal. They must have had 200 planes over our heads. Normally you have the planes and that’s it, like the Super Bowl parade. And everyone goes crazy, and that’s it.”

The relationship between the two leaders has been fraught thanks to overt criticisms, policy disagreements, and competing displays of masculinity. But both men go out of their way to say that all is fine and dandy between them. “[Macron] and I have a very good relationship,” Trump reiterated.

Macron, Trump, and their wives had dinner together at Le Jules Verne, a Michelin-starred restaurants in the Eiffel Tower. Trump made no comment about the food in the transcribed interview, but he did comment on the crowd size: “The bottom of the Eiffel Tower looked like they could have never had a bigger celebration ever in the history of the Eiffel Tower. I mean, there were thousands and thousands of people, ’cause they heard we were having dinner.”

Trump also shared something he learned on his visit to the Invalides and Napoléon’s tomb with Macron. “Well, Napoleon finished a little bit bad. But I asked that. So I asked the president, so what about Napoleon? He said: ‘No, no, no. What he did was incredible. He designed Paris. The street grid, the way they work, you know, the spokes. He did so many things even beyond.’” In fact, Trump combined Napoléon III and Napoléon I into one Super Napoléon with all the accomplishments of both Napoléons. In reality, Napoléon III built Paris, and Napoléon I is the military leader in the tomb. Trump continued, “And his one problem is he didn’t go to Russia that night because he had extracurricular activities, and they froze to death. How many times has Russia been saved by the weather?”

Featured image: Stock Photos from Frederic Legrand – COMEO/Shutterstock

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